An open letter to my babies who refuse to sleep

Dear babies,

It’s your Mama. You hopefully know me as the person who feeds you, changes you, bathes you, sings to you, cuddles you, and most importantly,  loves you. You may also know me as the sleep drunk woman in pyjamas with a zombie face staggering into your room several times a night in response to your screams.


"Oh is this bed not for climbing?" -Raegan

Now, here’s the thing, babies. That sleep that you so fight, that you resist, you need so much. You need it to grow and learn. And me? I need it so as to not go on a rampage or start pulling my hair out. In short, I need it to keep me sane.


Ella snoozing

I do really appreciate that you fall asleep around 6:30 AM and give me a blissful 15 to 20 minutes of uninterrupted beauty sleep before your brother wakes me up with the sound of a firetruck. Really, I do. But what if we tried a bit longer?


Raegan the tummy sleeper

I know that usually we see each other five or six times a night now. But remember those few times we didn’t see each other? I was still here in the morning, still sang you songs and got you dressed, still gave you cuddles.  You don’t have to worry babies, I’ll always be here. I’m just down the hall, tucked in my bed, mouth open, dreaming of my babies growing, learning.


I hear you in the afternoon,  babbling to each other,  telling stories, and not sleeping. I get dinner ready and wonder how two little people could refuse sleep so much and then when I get you, you nuzzle into my shoulder,  rubbing your chubby little fingers into your eyes, sometimes sucking your thumb. Is it that you miss me? Or think you’re missing out on something? Soon, you’ll learn how valuable sleep is and you’ll never want to get up. It’s possible I’ll still be playing catch up from now and will be there with you, tucked into bed, mouth open, dreaming of my babies learning,  growing.


Sweet dreams little ones,



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