We’re one week old!


Our baby girls are one week old! What a week it’s been, filled with so much emotion, not a day has gone by where tears weren’t shed, but smiles have abounded as well.

The girls may be identical, but their beginnings have been anything but.

Though small, Raegan is doing so well, and is back at her birth weight. I’ve been able to spend hours cuddling with her and have even checked her temperature and changed her bum (she protested at both). It’s hard to believe I’d be excited to change a diaper, but it made me feel more like her Mama even though I was terrified since she’s so small and there were wires everywhere.  Raegan loves to be sung to, and likes her pacifier,  she’s also sassy and cries when she doesn’t like something.  She’s exclusively on milk and getting 9 ml every two hours. Her hair is so soft and I just discovered she has dimples.

Ella has had a hard time. Though bigger, she has struggled since being born way too early. She had a small pocket of air in her lung, and was diagnosed as having a pneumothorax, same as her Dad, though hers is not genetic and she will most likely not have it again as an adult like he does. A small chest tube was inserted for a few days, but was removed yesterday and her breathing is still really good, often only receiving room air oxygen levels, same as what we breathe. Our beautiful girl also has bleeding in her brain, though it is too soon to know what it means, we’ve been told twice that she may struggle with movement. She has retained fluids and so has looked quite puffy, though that has started to go down. Ella had a long pick inserted today, which is essentially a longer lasting IV so the doctors don’t have to keep poking her. She has mostly been sedated to help with the pain, and has had way too many ultrasounds and x-rays for someone so little. I haven’t been allowed to hold her yet, though I did get to change her bum today. Like her sister, she wasn’t a huge fan. I’m dying to hold her and comfort her, and I’ve been told I can hold her soon. Ella just started eating milk and is up to 4 ml every 2 hours.

I’ve been pumping tirelessly since their birth which is awful. I am not producing nearly enough milk for both girls, but I have milk this time, after having none with Buds. I feel like Jas and I are constantly sterilizing pump parts and I sit around attached to the pump, much like a cow.

Buds has yet to meet his sisters but is practicing their names.

It’s been a long week, but I cannot wait to hold both my girls and tell them how much they are loved already.

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